You'll Be Okay, Anyway
by blaine-alicious
Summary: "Why would you want to be with a guy with cancer? Well, not be with, that's not what I meant-" "Why not?" 50/50 AU, Klaine style.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I'd like to thank my awesome beta Nine of Hearts for helping me with this story! Title is from Chemo Limo by Regina Spektor.

* * *

*To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering. -Friedrich Nietzsche*

Kurt Hummel was not a crier. He was not, he was not, he was not.

At least that's what he was telling himself as he leaned against the side of the building, trying to control his breathing. He could feel the tears dripping down his cheeks as he frantically wiped them away. There really was no use for tears. They wouldn't change the news he had just received.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to compose himself. He had to get up. He had to go do something. Anything. Eyes still closed, he reached for the bag he had flung when he had all but collapsed on the sidewalk. His fingertips had just reached the strap when he felt a pull, heard the scuff of a shoe, and his eyes flew open.

"Oh, fuck," groaned the shadow on the ground. Kurt could barely make out the outline that lay before him.

"Are you okay?" he asked quickly, nearly forgetting his own problems.

"Yeah, nothing serious, but I think I should be the one asking you that," replied the man who slowly stood up before him. "What are you doing out here in the dark? You could get attacked by- by a wild animal or something!"

Kurt snorted at the man's concern. "A wild animal in Lima? What are you, new? But I'm fine, thank you very much, just enjoying the fresh air."

"Ouch, the defenses are up," replied the other man, putting his hands up apologetically.

"Sorry, just a bad day."

"How 'bout I buy you some coffee? It can fix pretty much everything."

_Not this, _Kurt thought bitterly before nodding. "Sure."

For reasons that he was unaware of, he found himself letting the man help him up. He dusted himself off, attempting to sling his bag over his shoulder with what little dignity he had left. Getting closer to the light of the coffee shop that the two were walking towards, Kurt was able to finally see the man walking beside him.

The light hit upon his face just right, highlighting his cheekbones and the curls breaking loose from the slight amount of gel that was in them. Kurt had to admit that this stranger was attractive. And damn, his eyebrows were awfully triangular. His eyes, which Kurt noticed were almost hazel or maybe amber, flicked over toward him.

Kurt looked away instantly, pushing the door open and entering the familiar shop.

A few minutes later, he leaned back against his chair, coffee in hand.

"So, are you going to tell me your name, oh mysterious one?" he asked with a smirk.

The man blushed instantly, a boyish charm to his face, and looked down at the coffee in his own hands.

"Blaine," he blurted, "Blaine Anderson."

"Nice to meet you, Blaine Anderson. I'm Kurt Hummel." Silence fell over the table for a moment as the two stared at each other momentarily before Kurt picked up the conversation once more, obviously grasping for the other man to say something, "So, _Blaine, _tell me about yourself."

Looking somewhat startled, the man- Blaine- floundered slightly for a moment before responding.

"I'm twenty-three, I work at the music store downtown and give piano lessons. Sang on the streets for a stretch while in school, was a fun time. Graduated from NYU and I hope to go back to New York someday… soon. Ohio's fine but it isn't for me. I grew up around here though and I went to high school at Dalton Academy."

"Ooh, Dalton," Kurt exclaimed, leaning over the table, "So I can presume you were a Warbler?"

"Blazer and all."

"Hm, those _were _some nice blazers," he replied, allowing himself to think back to Sectionals his senior year. They had competed against the Warblers, wouldn't he remember this man? Looking at him now in the coffee shop, he thought that he must have some memory of him. He wouldn't forget someone like this.

"Holy crap."

"What?" asked Blaine, slightly surprised by the exclamation.

"I remember you! You had that one solo… whoa. You were _good_."

The other man looked at the table sheepishly, "I have a slight confession. Well, that makes it sound bad, but it really isn't-"

"Oh just say it already!" Kurt prodded impatiently.

"I already knew who you were. At least, I thought I knew. And I was right, so kudos to me!" Blaine continued, eyes smiling.

Kurt couldn't help but laugh. Blaine was just so damn charming. A loveable blabbermouth, he would even say. He was so upbeat about everything. But, then again, he was about one hundred percent certain that he had not gotten the news that Kurt had just received.

"So, there's no need for me to introduce myself?" he finally replied, snapping himself out of his reverie.

"Hey now, don't just assume I'm a stalker. All I know is your name and where you went to high school! … Yeah, that does sound a little creepy," Blaine allowed, rubbing the back of his neck as he laughed.

"Well, it is a bit stalker-esque," Kurt admitted in response, "But, I suppose I can humour you. I'm Kurt as you, of course, know. I'm twenty-three as well and recently graduated from NYADA. Just got back in town and I'm going to be working at good ol' Hummel Tire and Lube!"

"Okay so we were practically neighbors in college and never crossed paths at all?! That's really weird! You don't have to answer this, but… why are you working at a car shop if you graduated from a performing arts school? And it's not like you can't sing-"

"I had other plans, but life got in the way," Kurt all but sighed, looking down at his coffee, "Maybe I'll go back to New York someday. I mean, I would love to."

Blaine peered up at him through thick lashes, with eyes that Kurt could feel himself falling into.

"Is that why you were upset? Life getting in the way?"

Once again, Kurt was forced to tear his eyes away from Blaine's, not wanting to stare.

"Wow, what a mood killer."

Blaine's head snapped up instantly, a look of remorse spreading across his face.

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding!" Kurt replied, laughing slightly at the other man's discomfort.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

"It's fine, Blaine! But you know what, I don't think I should answer that today. Might ruin the moment. Actually, how about this? If we're still talking a month from now, then I'll tell you. Sound like a plan?" he asked, pausing to take a sip of his coffee.

What the hell was he doing? Jerking some poor man around? Eh, what the hell, what else did he have to do? Not like this Blaine guy would stick around that long anyway. No one ever did.

Even as he thought that, he wanted it to be different. He wanted to get to know Blaine better.

"Only a month?" the man across the table responded suddenly, "I think I can manage that."


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Reviews always appreciated :)

* * *

A mere two days later, Kurt found himself sitting at the Lima Bean again, staring at Blaine's number on his phone. It'd be creepy if he called him, right? But, he had given Kurt his phone number… Deciding to live a little, noting the irony in that phrase at the moment, he pressed the talk button.

The ringing echoed in his head as he tried to think of what to say. Torn between hanging up and waiting for an answer, he didn't even hear the noise stop until the voice on the other end jutted him back to reality.

"Hello? Kurt, is that you?"

"Oh, uh, yeah. Sorry, I know we just met and all and you're probably busy-" he blathered, inexplicably nervous.

"Not at all, you wanna grab coffee or something?" Blaine replied cheerfully.

Looking down at the cup already in his hand, inspiration struck him.

"No, we're gonna do something better than that," Kurt responded with a slight smile, "Can you pick me up at the Lima Bean?"

* * *

"_THIS_ is what you had in mind?" Blaine practically screeched as the rollercoaster began climbing upward.

"Well, not this in particular, but I thought maybe it was time to start working on my bucket list. And you know, you seemed like just the right person to do it with," Kurt said, blushing slightly.

Blaine would have responded had he had the time, but the coaster took a sudden nosedive and he found himself clinging to Kurt's arm. Rollercoasters were definitely not his thing, but he had ignored that fact because Kurt had seemed so eager.

Speaking of the other man, he was much more enthused by the ride. He raised the arm that Blaine wasn't holding onto and let out a yell as the drop continued.

"Holy shit," Blaine half screamed, his face buried in Kurt's shoulder.

"Live a little," Kurt yelled back, the coaster now beginning a series of loops.

Tentatively at first, Blaine put one arm up. Then, with uninhibited boldness, he laced the fingers of his other hand through Kurt's and raised their arms together. They yelled in unison, the last drop of the rollercoaster seeming to last forever.

When the ride finally screeched to a stop, Kurt couldn't help but laugh at the sight of Blaine. His hair had half escaped from the gel, and he had such a happy smile on his face.

"You have a bit of a fro going on there," Kurt couldn't resist saying as they walked down the steps, "But I actually kind of like it."

Blaine reached up and ran a hand through his hair, grimacing as it got stuck in the remnants of the gel. "Your hair doesn't look all that great either," he shot back, still laughing.

Kurt didn't care.

All he cared about was this. And he didn't want it to end. This strange night with this strange stranger. Running on endorphins, he grabbed Blaine's hand, pulling him out of the tiny amusement park.

He looked up, grinning at Kurt.

"The night is young," Kurt explained, "Wanna cross something else off?"

Blaine looked puzzled, but nodded anyway.

* * *

"You _live _here?" Blaine asked, looking around with slight amazement as they pulled up in his car.

"My dad's a Congressman, kinda famous here," Kurt laughed, "He said him and Carole had a few extra rooms, so _voila, _here I am!"

Blaine gazed at the house, trying not to gape.

"Anyways, we're not going in. You think I'm going to let a perfect stranger into my house? We're going to the backyard."

"I am _not _a stranger! I knew you before!"

"We stood on the same stage for all of ten minutes like five years ago. That does not count as knowing me, Blaine."

The shorter man shook his head, knowing he couldn't win the argument.

"Backyard. Follow me." Kurt led Blaine to the backyard, then turned to him, "Wait a second."

He left Blaine standing there as he entered the house, finally coming back out with several buckets of paint and a giant canvas under his arm. Blaine stared at him, obviously confused.

"Paint party picnic," Kurt replied to his unvoiced confusion, looking at Blaine like it was the simplest thing in the world. "Also, you might want to put these on, don't wanna ruin your fashionable threads." He threw him an old t-shirt and shorts, holding onto a set for himself. Blaine looked at him skeptically, but then just shrugged and pulled his shirt off.

Kurt felt his breath hitch and quickly averted his gaze, hoping Blaine hadn't caught him staring and thought him creepy. Turning around, he changed his clothes hurriedly, trying not to think about how weird it was to be changing in the middle of his backyard with a virtual stranger.

"Don't want to destroy your Alexander McQueen?" Blaine asked suddenly, jerking Kurt from his thoughts. "Oh come on now, don't give me that look. I tend to embrace the stereotype that all gays _must _be fashionably inclined!"

Unable to stop himself, Kurt snorted as he began to roll out the huge canvas. "So, you're, uh, you're-"

"Gay. Yep. Wait… was it not obvious to you?"

"You… you seemed a little straight," he replied, not knowing how to word what he wanted to say.

"Am I really that bad at flirting?" Blaine asked, pouting up at Kurt, "I bought you coffee!"

He shook his head, putting stones on each corner of the canvas, "Don't you make that face at me Blaine Anderson!"

"Irresistible, right? Coop always said I had the perfect pathetic puppy face."

"Coop?"

"Brother. Anyway, what exactly are you doing?"

Kurt opened the paint buckets, looking up at Blaine. "We're going to paint!"

Blaine looked around for a moment. "There aren't any brushes."

"Oh heavens!" Kurt mock cried, "What ever shall we do?"

This received a glare from Blaine, who watched as Kurt flung a scoop of paint across the canvas. He didn't fully understand what was happening, but the paint splattered across, and he had to admit that it looked kind of cool. Shrugging, he submerged his hand into a different bucket of paint and threw a handful onto the canvas.

"Ooh, this is fun," he muttered to himself, turning red when he realized that Kurt had heard. Spinning away from him, he tentatively walked onto the canvas, his bare feet creating slight indentations in the material. Dumping an entire bucket across, he slid through the splatter, doing a signature Warbler's move.

"I do believe I've seen that move at Sectionals," Kurt jested, following his lead and walking onto the paint, doing a little twirl as well.

He only got a nod in response as he continued to watch Blaine spin around in the paint. He was humming a tune Kurt thought he recognized, but he couldn't quite put a finger on it. Watching him now, all other thoughts were erased from his mind.

"_You make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream_," Blaine sang softly, looking up at the starry sky as he whirled around.

"You have a beautiful voice," Kurt commented quietly.

"Thank you," he murmured, trailing off as he looked down at his paint-covered feet.

"No, keep singing, it's nice."

Deciding to just go for it, Blaine picked back up with the song, singing it in the slow manner that the Warbler's had rejected for a more upbeat version all those years ago. He watched Kurt watching him and held out his hand, his next sentence barely a whisper, "Dance with me?"

Opening his mouth, then shutting it just as quickly, Kurt grabbed Blaine's hand silently, listening to him sing as they danced slowly. One of Blaine's hands rested on his back, the other interlaced with his. He placed his free hand on Blaine's shoulder as they moved together through the paint.

"_We drove to Cali and got drunk on the beach, got a motel and built a fort out of sheets. I finally found you, my missing puzzle piece. I'm complete_."

"We should go to Cali one day," Kurt interrupted, not fully aware of what he was saying. He was clearly losing it if he was asking a guy he'd met two days ago to go to California with him, but somehow he didn't feel the need to retract the offer.

Blaine just nodded, continuing to sing as Kurt closed his eyes.

They kept spinning slowly long after Blaine had finished the song. When Kurt finally opened his eyes, the other man's face was much closer to him than he'd imagined. He tripped backward in surprise, pulling the both of them down into the paint with a thud, their hands still intertwined.

"S-sorry, sorry," he spluttered, attempting to brush paint off of Blaine's shoulder.

"It's fine," he replied, nose crinkling as he laughed, laying on his back.

"You're lying in the paint," Kurt said flatly.

"And you say that like it's a bad thing. But look up! It's so pretty."

Kurt turned his face towards the sky, just realizing how bright it had become. Sighing, he laid down next to Blaine.

"I can't believe this wasn't on my bucket list," he whispered, staring up, "Stargazing with a mysterious stranger." His paint covered hand shot to his mouth as he realized what he had said. Pulling his hand away from his mouth moments later however, he realized that he really didn't care. That stupid news he had received the other day had made him reckless with his emotions.

"You've got some paint on your face," Blaine said quietly, "And you're cute."

Kurt turned red, refusing to look at Blaine.

"What if this is it?" he asked suddenly, unable to contain his thoughts.

"And you think _I'm _the mood killer," Blaine laughed in lieu of an answer.

"I'm serious! What if this is all there is? And tomorrow I get hit by a bus or you get hit by a bus or we both get hit by a bus or we're in a bus and its gets hit. I mean, the possibilities are endless," babbled Kurt, finally turning his face towards Blaine.

"Then we better make the most of right now," Blaine responded, "But I promise I'll stay away from buses if it gives me more time with you."

"Oh shut up you," Kurt said, fondly hitting Blaine on the shoulder.

"Hate to change the subject, but you said this was a paint party _picnic_?"

Kurt glared at him for a second before smiling. "Oh so you're just using me for my food?"

"Nah, it's a perk."

* * *

"Thanks," Kurt said, a few hours later, as they cleaned up.

"For what? I'm pretty sure this was all your idea."

"Yeah, but most people wouldn't go along with it- especially with a random stranger. I mean, I could have been a serial killer for all you knew."

"You still _could _be, you haven't completely changed my mind yet."

"Gee thanks," Kurt replied, throwing a biscuit and hitting Blaine in the head.

"Ow, uncalled for!"

"Totally called for."


	3. Chapter 3

A week later, Kurt found himself standing in the parking lot of the hospital, staring at the entrance. He had to go in. What else was he going to do? He couldn't just sit there and avoid the inevitable. Besides, his dad had already dropped him off, leaving only at Kurt's insistence that being a Congressman was hard work and he couldn't just put off meetings to hold Kurt's hand at the doctor's office.

For reasons he was unaware of, he found himself pulling out his phone and calling Blaine.

"Hello?"

"Hey, it's Kurt," he said shakily.

"Kurt! Are you okay?" Blaine asked, instantly sounding concerned.

"Yeah, I'm alright. I just… I don't know why I called actually. I'm just scared," he admitted, staring at the foreboding doors in front of him.

"Do you need help? Where are you?"

"No, nothing happened," replied Kurt with an unsteady laugh.

"What's wrong?" Blaine responded after a moment's pause.

"What- what would you do if you had to do something that you really didn't want to, but you knew you had to?"

There was another pause before Blaine spoke up again, "I'd remember that it was for the best and that I was strong enough to do it."

"Thank you," Kurt said quietly.

* * *

Soon afterward, Kurt found himself sitting in the treatment room, an IV dripping into his arm. He felt strangely calm after his phone call with Blaine. Leaning his head back, he stared at the television, wishing that he had remembered his latest copy of Vogue. But, he thought bitterly to himself, there was always next time.

He stared at the crappy reality show for a while, jumping when his phone vibrated in his pocket.

_COURAGE - - - Blaine_

Fuck. Why did this stupid guy have to be so fucking perfect? Kurt slumped in the chair, fighting between smiling and crying as he sent out a response that in his mind had a watery smile much like his own at the moment.

_You're ridiculous :) _

* * *

Kurt went about his days as normally as he could- which wasn't that normal if you considered the fact that Burt and Carole tiptoed around him, like they were afraid he would break. He knew that they had his best interests at heart, but it was just really hard. One morning, two weeks after he had met Blaine, he had had enough.

"Stop it!" he borderline shouted, causing Carole to jump as his fist slammed on the table.

She opened her mouth to speak, looking slightly stunned, but Kurt spoke faster, standing up.

"Stop walking around like I'm some delicate little bird that's going to break if you say the wrong thing. I'm not. I- I'm not-" he started, breath hitching with a sob as he found Carole's arms wrapped around him.

"Sh, it's okay," she muttered into his hair, hand moving to wipe the tears that were making their way down his face. She led him to the couch, pulling him down next to her. "Kurt, you're so strong. Your father and I- we're so proud of you for everything you've done and we know you can beat this. I… I'm sorry we were acting like you could break, I didn't even realize. I promise we won't act like that anymore, you're still Kurt. You're still unbelievably strong. You can do this."

He wanted to believe her so desperately, breathing in the familiar scent of her perfume, trying to calm down. "I love you so much," he muttered.

"I love you too, honey."

* * *

"Can you help me with something?" Kurt said into the phone.

"Sure. Are you okay?" Blaine asked a little hesitantly, probably thinking about the last time they had spoken- four days ago.

Kurt brushed it off quickly, "Yeah, it was nothing. I just have a slight favour to ask of you."

"Go on," he replied with a teasing smile in his voice.

"Could you perhaps give me a ride to the music store?"

"The one I work at?"

"No, because there are just _so _many music stores in Ohio," Kurt joked.

"Ouch, I'm wounded!"

* * *

"Don't you have a car?" Blaine asked suddenly as they drove to the store.

"Nope, don't even have a license," Kurt replied, Blaine turning to stare for a fraction of a second before putting his attention back on the road.

"Why not?"

"Well, I lived in New York for so long that it wasn't necessary. _And _it's incredibly dangerous. It's like the fifth leading cause of death-" Kurt realized what he was saying, laughing to himself. He had always been afraid of driving for some unexplainable reason and now it just seemed stupid.

They arrived at the store, Kurt turning to Blaine, "Is the trunk empty?"

"Uh yes?" Looking somewhat confused, Blaine continued, "And that matters why? Are you going to be hiding a dead body?"

"Why didn't you ask any of this on the phone?" Kurt smirked.

"I don't know, I just wanted to see you," he confessed, a shy smile on his face.

Slightly flustered by that comment, Kurt answered the previous question. "I'm making a purchase today and I'm going to need some help with the transportation. So no, no dead body."

"You can play an instrument?"

"Nope, I'm going to work on that," he responded.

Blaine just kind of stared at Kurt for a moment, looking startled when a blonde man walked up to them.

"Hey B, can I help you guys?"

"No thanks Matt, I think we got this," Blaine replied with an easy grin.

As Matt walked away, Kurt glanced at Blaine. "B? That's cute."

"If you say so. Pretty sure only Matt and Coop call me that. Anyway, what is this super awesome purchase you're making today?"

Kurt grabbed his hand, leading him wordlessly to the back where the pianos were on display.

"Um, my trunk may be big but I'm pretty sure it can't fit a piano," Blaine laughed.

"Keyboard, Blaine, keyboard. I'm not really feeling like finding a way to transport an entire piano."

Blaine just gazed at Kurt as he scrutinized each keyboard, admiring the way the soft light of the store hit Kurt's face and the intensity with which he looked at each instrument. Kurt walked on, finally selecting a sleek black one in the corner.

"This is the one."

"It's nice," Blaine murmured, not really sure what had just happened.

"So, you're going to help me get it in the car, right?"


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: There are two songs in this chapter and if you're interested they're on YouTube and marked by asterisks in the chapter!

* /watch?v=TXBnLf68jw4

** /watch?v=xZh8gi5Aq6s

* * *

After much pushing and shoving, Kurt and Blaine got the keyboard into the car. One quick drive later, the two were pushing the keyboard into Kurt's living room, arranging it just so. Leaning against the wall with a sigh of relief, Kurt surveyed their work.

"It's perfect," Blaine muttered.

"Can you play me something?"

Blaine hesitated slightly before nodding and seating himself on the piano bench. He began to play, faltering at first, then becoming more confident. He closed his eyes, fingers gliding over the keys. *

Kurt watched and listened, almost afraid to breathe. All too soon, the music came to an end and he exhaled slowly. "Holy crap, Blaine. That was beautiful."

Blaine laughed, bowing sarcastically. "Want to give it a shot?"

Almost forgetting his intention to learn, Kurt stared for a minute before nodding. This probably wasn't going to end well, seeing how easily frustrated he often got. Sitting down on the bench, he ran his hands across the keys.

Blaine sat down beside him, his body comfortably close to Kurt's.

"Okay, so I'm definitely not the most patient, but I promise I'll try," Kurt muttered, fingers still playing with the keys.

* * *

Having learned where the keys were and spending quite a bit of time practicing, Kurt was able to play Hot Cross Buns, which pretty much amounted to the simplest song on any instrument.

"Ready for a real song?"

"Yeah, probably not," Kurt retorted with a laugh, continuing to play the same tune over and over again.

"I'll help you out," Blaine said, reaching around him and putting his own hands on the keys. "Put your hands on mine."

Kurt almost shuddered as he felt the other man's soft breath on the back of his neck, and he nodded uncertainly as he placed his hands atop Blaine's.

He started to move his hands, Kurt moving along with him. **

Kurt recognized the song, staring at the keys and wishing he had the talent that Blaine had. As the music continued, he closed his eyes and felt Blaine move closer to him, relaxing into the song.

As the music trailed to a close, Kurt turned towards Blaine, his eyes still closed, their noses brushing against each other. He inhaled sharply and barely had time to react when he felt lips on his in a gentle kiss. Kurt responded for a second before jerking away. He couldn't do this. No matter how much he wanted to, he couldn't.

Blaine stared at Kurt with wide eyes akin to a puppy dog, slightly shocked.

"I-I'm sorry, I just can't-" Kurt stammered, trying to say what he really didn't want to. He couldn't hurt Blaine the way that he knew he would if he told him.

There was a moment's pause as the two stared at each other. "Should I… Should I go?" Blaine asked, looking down at his hands, desperately wishing that he hadn't just ruined things.

Kurt merely looked away, trying to subtly sniff back tears as Blaine stood up and began to walk slowly away, not knowing what he should do.

"I'm sorry," he finally said, just as Blaine reached the front door.

Blaine just stared for a moment.

"I just- I don't want to hurt you."

"Pretty sure I can take care of myself," Blaine bit back, self-defense evident in his voice.

Taking a deep breath, Kurt prepared himself, "It's not that, it's just- I haven't really been honest with you. And… knowing the truth would hurt you and not knowing it would hurt you and, there's really just no way to not hurt you."

Blaine stared in silence, trying to register what he had just said. "Just- just tell me. Tell me whatever it is."

"I… I can't. Not right now. I'm sorry."

And with that, Blaine was gone, running down the front walk. Kurt watched from the door, tears now freely tracing paths down his cheeks. Why did Blaine have to go and complicate everything?

Even as he thought that, he couldn't blame the other man. He wanted it, wanted Blaine. But he couldn't have him. Kurt knew that that was not how the universe worked. It wouldn't be fair to Blaine to give him all of Kurt's problems. He just had to let him go.

Kurt sniffed again, sinking to the floor, arms around himself. He could do this alone. He'd done so much by himself already, what was a little more going to hurt?

* * *

Two weeks and six ignored phone calls later, Kurt didn't know what to do. As much as he felt that he should just forget about Blaine, he couldn't force himself to do that. He didn't want to keep avoiding him like this. And, well, it had been a month since they first met. He could just tell him and hope for the best. Blaine would probably turn and run in the other direction. It would be better that way anyhow.

At least, that's what he tried to tell himself. In actuality, he wanted Blaine to stay. He wanted him to make some of the hurt go away. He just really wanted someone to care about him.

Kurt had his family, of course. But he was just so lonely. All of his friends from McKinley had moved on with their lives, going off to L.A., starting a family. He'd never had a boyfriend, or even a best friend for that matter. He just needed someone to turn to.

Deciding to just go for it, he picked up his phone and dialed Blaine's number with shaky hands.

"Kurt! Hello!" he heard from the other end of the phone, just a hint of hope there.

"Hi, Blaine. Look… I'm sorry I've been avoiding you. Can I show you something?"

"Should I meet you somewhere?"

"Actually, could you pick me up? I'm at home now."

Without answering any of Blaine's questions, Kurt hung up the phone feeling both horrified and relieved. He hated going on for this long without talking to Blaine. At least this way he could have closure. Blaine would probably make his excuses and be on his way, and Kurt wouldn't have to think of what ifs.

* * *

"Where exactly are we going?" Blaine asked, Kurt climbing into the passenger seat.

"Nowhere fun, don't worry. And please, please don't get mad at me for this. And no questions now, at least. I'll try later, but I just can't right now."

Blaine glanced at him with concern, but saw Kurt's determination and turned back to the road.

With Kurt giving directions, they made it to the hospital entrance.

"Pull in here."

"What?" Blaine asked sharply, his worry visibly growing.

"Just do it."

He parked the car, following Kurt towards the building. They kept walking up to what Kurt thought of as the chemo floor, and it was obvious that Blaine had no idea what was happening.

"Okay, now if this freaks you out you can leave," Kurt said with a shaky voice, "And I can just call my dad for a ride home. I just, yeah, I'll just call him."

"I'm not going to leave," Blaine replied with more confidence than he was feeling, dreading what he was about to learn.

They entered room 105, Kurt waving to a nurse that said hello to them. After adjusting another patient's IV, she hurried over to him.

"Hello, Kurt! Glad you brought someone with you today," she said brightly.

"Hi, Nancy. This is Blaine," he replied, motioning to Blaine who stood there dumbfounded. He nodded politely, looking around the room. There were several older looking people, all connected to IVs and either sitting with their eyes closed or staring ahead at the television. Kurt didn't belong here, what were they doing?

Kurt sat down, observing Blaine staring at him unsteadily. Averting his eyes, he instead turned to watch Nancy put the IV in his arm, wincing at the slight pinch.

"There ya go. Let me know if you need anything, sweetie," she said gently, rubbing his back as she stood up.

"Thanks, Nanc."

As she walked away, Blaine shuffled towards Kurt. "What is this?" he asked quietly.

"Come on, Blaine. You have to have at least a little bit of a clue," Kurt said with a snap. Suddenly aware of what he just said, he shook his head. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."

"I'm not stupid. You're obviously sick, I just… Is this chemo?" he whispered, gesturing to the room as a whole.

Kurt nodded slowly, leaning back in the chair.

"Yeah, I… I have cancer, Blaine."

Kurt glanced up at Blaine as he said it, watching the other man's face crumple at the gravity of the words. The lines on his forehead softened and his mouth dropped open as he put a hand on the chair next to him, trying not to fall over.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Now, I know this one is pretty short, but I _could _be persuaded into posting the next one in a few days (yes that is a bribe for reviews because I like hearing people's opinions :D)

* * *

Blaine gaped for a moment, letting the information sink in. "Is this what you weren't being truthful about?"

"Yeah… and it's why I was so upset the night we met."

Blaine stared at his feet, trying to steady himself. It felt like his world was tipping, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. This wasn't happening, it couldn't be happening.

"Do you have any questions?" Kurt asked almost mechanically, waiting to tell Blaine the specifics, the medical terms he had learned only weeks earlier. That was the first thing everyone asked: what kind of cancer? As if the type really made a difference.

Instead, Blaine merely shook his head, "I just wish… I don't' know, I just wish that you didn't have to deal with this."

"Yeah, me too," Kurt scoffed before his face softened, "But it's life, it's not going to be fair."

Blaine stood there for a minute, unable to tear his eyes away from Kurt.

"I understand if you want to leave, it's fine, it's whatever."

"What?" he responded, sinking into the chair beside Kurt.

"Why would you want to be with a guy with cancer? Well, not _be with_, that's not what I meant-"

"Why not?" Blaine said, trying to ignore the tears threatening to spill out.

"What?" Kurt asked disbelievingly, voice barely above a whisper as he picked at the hem of his shirt.

"Why would I not want to be with you? You're beautiful and talented and sarcastic and strange in that good way that everyone should be strange in. And you're… you're just wonderful and all I think every day is, 'Wow I hope I get to spend more time with Kurt.' Why would I not want to be with you?" Blaine replied in one breath, trying to express his feelings quickly before Kurt interrupted him. As he finished his last sentence, he closed his eyes, almost shaking with the realization that he had finally said all of the words that he had been suppressing since meeting Kurt.

When he opened his eyes again, it was because he felt Kurt's hand on his. He stared at Blaine for a minute before saying, "If I didn't feel so nauseous I swear I would kiss you so hard on your big stupid mouth."

Blaine just grinned slightly in response, lacing his fingers in Kurt's. "This'll do for now."

* * *

After a different nurse had come and unhooked Kurt's IV several hours later, Blaine helped him stand up, noticing how tired he was.

"Would it be too forward if I said you could spend the night at my house?" Blaine asked.

"I'm not going to be any fun, just warning you," Kurt muttered, remembering how exhausted he had been after his last treatment.

"I know, I just- I want to be there for you."

Nodding at him, Kurt smiled faintly with just a hint of sadness.

* * *

As they pulled up to Blaine's house, Kurt sent Carole a quick text. _At a friend's- be back tomorrow. Love ya_

"Well, it certainly isn't as large as your house, but it's home," Blaine said, ushering Kurt inside.

"It's perfect," he replied, admiring the lived-in rec room they entered, trying to take in everything despite the fatigue threatening to overcome him.

As they were heading towards the living room, Kurt's knees suddenly buckled, spots blurring his vision. Almost crashing to the floor, he felt strong arms wrap around him, pulling him back up.

"Kurt, _Kurt,_ are you okay?"

He merely nodded in response, letting the arms pull him onto the couch. "You're so strong," he mumbled, nuzzling into Blaine, only half conscious and drifting towards sleep.

Blaine blinked away tears and put his arm over the other man's waist, allowing him to move in closer.

How could Kurt have ever thought that he would run away because of this? After having known him for only a month, Blaine could already feel himself getting entangled in the mess that was Kurt Hummel's life.


	6. Chapter 6

After what had to be a few hours, Kurt woke up. Unaware of where he was at first, he looked around groggily. At the realization that Blaine's arm was around him, he blinked quickly, trying to register everything. Blaine hadn't run away. It looked to be just the opposite.

About to turn towards him, Kurt had to force a hand over his mouth as a sudden wave of nausea hit him. Careful not to wake Blaine, he bolted down the hall in search of a bathroom. Finding it, he quickly dove towards the toilet, emptying the contents of his stomach as quietly as he could. Leaning against the wall, he wiped his mouth and slumped back. Not feeling strong enough to stand up, he was still sitting there when he heard footsteps coming down the hall.

Great. Exactly what Blaine needed to see. What if this was enough to make him run? Even this was difficult to focus on as the bigger picture came into his head and he choked back tears.

"Kurt?" came Blaine's voice from outside the door, "Can I come in?"

"Mhm," he mumbled back quietly.

Blaine opened the door slowly, inhaling softly when he saw Kurt on the floor.

"Sorry you have to see this," he muttered from his spot on the ground.

"Don't- don't ever be sorry," Blaine responded, grabbing a washcloth from the sink and wetting it. He got down on the floor next to Kurt, pressing the cool cloth to his forehead. He sighed, leaning into Blaine.

"My mom used to do this when I got sick," Blaine whispered, talking just to fill the quiet.

Kurt stayed silent, tears still making their way down his face.

"_Kurt-"_ Blaine started, his voice cracking slightly.

"50/50," he muttered as an answer.

Blaine stared at him, trying to ignore what he had just said.

"Those are my chances. 50/50," Kurt continued, sounding defeated.

"But you're going to be okay. You- you have to be okay," Blaine whispered, more to himself than to Kurt, breath hitching as he visibly shook.

"I'm just…I'm so scared. It-it's really hard to do this alone," Kurt replied, choking back another sob.

Blaine pulled Kurt halfway into his lap, leaning back on the wall and allowing him to lie almost across him, Kurt's face buried in his shirt. He rubbed circles on Kurt's back with one hand, the other smoothing back his hair. "It'll be okay," he muttered, "I'll be there. You won't ever be alone."

"I keep waiting for you to say goodbye and run," Kurt admitted, the sentence slightly muffled, the warm movement of his mouth shifting the other man's now tear-stained shirt.

"I don't think I'll be saying goodbye anytime soon."

* * *

After sitting there for several more minutes folded around each other, Blaine realized how uncomfortable the floor was and decided to help Kurt back to the living room. He pulled him up slowly, one arm wrapped around his waist.

"Do you want me to bring you home?" he asked quietly.

Kurt shook his head, leaning back into the couch as they reached the living room. "Too much movement."

"Okay, well if you're going to stay here I'm going to have to insist that you wear something a little more comfortable than those _really _tight jeans."

"Noticing how tight my jeans are, Anderson?" Kurt teased with as much humour as he could muster while wiping away the traces of tears that still lingered on his face.

"Not at all," Blaine replied, sauntering into his bedroom to grab clothes. He reentered the living room and handed Kurt a NYU shirt and a pair of sweatpants. "I'm afraid that these pants might be just a tad short, but at least they're comfy."

Kurt thanked him, walking slowly to the bathroom to change. As he brushed his teeth with the spare toothbrush that he had in his bag, he sighed, noticing the dark circles under his eyes that were starting to form. Turning away, he changed as quickly as he could and finally walked back into the living room to find Blaine searching for blankets.

"Now," Kurt said, causing Blaine to jump, "Don't judge me for how bad I look."

"Shit, you scared me," Blaine replied as he turned around, "And you could never look bad."

Kurt smirked, sinking onto the couch.

"You want the bed?" Blaine asked, "I'll sleep on the couch."

Kurt mumbled incoherently, the exhaustion starting to return.

"Okay, I think it's bedtime for you," Blaine said, putting an arm around him and pulling him to his feet.

After nearly dragging him into the bedroom, he helped Kurt onto the bed, drawing the blanket over him. "You warm enough?"

"Mhm," Kurt muttered, turning to face him with bleary eyes.

"Okay… well, goodnight," said Blaine awkwardly, about to leave.

"Stay," he heard Kurt mumble almost inaudibly.

"What?"

"Stay, please?" he pleaded feebly, rolling over and pulling the blanket up to his chin.

Blaine stared at him for a moment, unsure of what to do, before sighing and crawling into bed next to him. It wasn't like he had wanted to leave him in the first place anyway.

"That's better," Kurt whispered as Blaine pulled him closer once more.

"Goodnight," he replied, pressing a kiss to the back of Kurt's head.

"You better be here in the morning," Kurt murmured.

"I'll be there."

"Promise?"

"I promise."


	7. Chapter 6 and a half

Blaine woke up the next morning, startled by Kurt's sudden movement in the bed and the sound of suppressed crying. It was a sound that Blaine never wanted to hear Kurt make ever again, but Kurt was trembling on the bed, his attempts to stop the tears failing miserably.

"Kurt?" he whispered, turning towards him, "What's wrong?"

"M-my," Kurt muttered in response, unable to form a complete sentence.

"Your what?"

"My hair," he finally spit out, seeming to crumple into the bed. Blaine sat straight up at this, finally awake enough to be somewhat aware of what was going on.

Kurt continued to talk, sniffling as he did so, "I mean, I knew it would happen, but."

Blaine reached out to the side, turning the light on with a snap. The sudden brightness illuminated the room and he could see Kurt laying there with one hand in front of him, staring despondently at the pieces of hair he was holding.

"Oh, Kurt," Blaine sighed, moving to put an arm around him.

"I have to cut it off," Kurt replied at once, pulling himself together.

"What?"

* * *

A few minutes later, they stood in Blaine's bathroom, both staring at the mirror.

"I'm gonna look weird," Kurt muttered.

"Shut up, you could never look weird," said Blaine as he draped a towel around his shoulders.

"You have to do it."

"What? No way, Kurt! If it looks bad then you're going to blame me every time you look in the mirror!"

"Of course it's going to look bad! I'm going to be _bald_!"

* * *

They stepped back from the mirror, admiring their work. "It looks weird," Kurt said shakily, running his hands over his head.

"Does not," Blaine replied as he pressed a kiss to Kurt's temple, "You look great. Besides, think of all the fashionable beanies you now have an excuse to wear."


	8. Chapter 7

After this, only one more chapter and then the epilogue! It's gone by fast :')

* * *

**Three Months Later**

Kurt walked out of the Lima Bean around midnight to find Finn waiting for him. After a quick hug and reassurance from Kurt that he would be okay, the two started walking towards Finn's car.

"Where's Dad?"

"He's at home. I just wanted to see you, Kurt. I feel like such a shitty brother, I haven't been here at all," Finn said, a look of guilt on his face.

"Finn, you have a _life. _Of course you weren't going to be back in Lima when I have Dad and Carole. I'm just really glad you're here now."

"I told Burt I wouldn't talk about how your surgery is tomorrow- Oh shit. Forget I said that. I didn't say anything," Finn mumbled, obviously trying to wrap his head around what he was and was not supposed to do.

After months of treatment, the doctors had told Kurt that surgery was the only possibility. The tumor wasn't responding to the chemotherapy, and if this didn't work, they would be out of options.

Kurt felt morose as he thought about it, finally looking up to see Finn staring at him with a strange look on his face.

"You alright, man?"

"Fine, Finn. Can- can I drive home?" he asked cautiously.

"Uh you don't even have a license," Finn reminded him.

"It might be my last chance," Kurt said, feeling slightly guilty for pulling the cancer card, but what the hell.

Finn gaped before handing Kurt the keys. They climbed into the car and Kurt started it.

"Okay, now just back up-" Finn began, cutting off when Kurt slammed on the gas, peeling out of the parking lot.

"_ONE WAY_! Kurt, this is one way!" yelled Finn as they turned down a road, the car still flying.

Kurt wasn't thinking, just going.

"Stop the car! Stop it!"

Kurt finally screeched to a halt, car half on the road and half on the grass as vehicles on the road with them beeped and drove around them.

"Get out," he whispered, "Just for a minute."

Finn looked confused, not moving as he stared at Kurt.

"_GET OUT_!"

Looking hurt, Finn jumped out of the car quickly, slamming the door. Kurt locked it, leaning his head against the steering wheel before hitting his hands on it.

"_DAMN IT_!" he yelled, "Damn it, damn it, fuck." He hit the wheel more, hot tears running down his face as he tried not to hyperventilate.

He sat like that for a few minutes and then pulled out his phone, dialing a number with shaky hands.

"Kurt? It's almost midnight. What's going on?"

Kurt laughed in response, "Um… just having a nervous breakdown. I may or may not have fractured my larynx and scared the shit out of my brother."

"Do you need me to come get you?" Blaine asked with concern.

"No, no, I just- I just wanted to hear your voice. I'm so fucking tired of being sick. Did you know that if this surgery doesn't work- well that's it."

"It'll work, Kurt. And I'll be there tomorrow, just like I promised. We talked about this, remember?"

Kurt was quiet, breathing more steadily now, "Mhm."

He jumped at a sudden knock on the window as Finn began to talk from outside, "Come on, man, let me in."

"I gotta go," he said into the phone, "But thank you."

"You'll be fine, Kurt. I'll see you tomorrow," Blaine replied before he hung up, whispering to himself, "You'll be fine."


	9. Chapter 8

A/N: Sorry it took me so long, but it's been a really crappy few days so please be nice

* * *

Blaine sprinted to the hospital after his shift at the music store, noting that it was a few minutes past when Kurt's surgery was scheduled to start. What if he had missed it? He tried not to think about it as he ran to the front doors. Instead his mind wandered to the past few months.

They had been difficult- first there was the chemo, and then the news that it hadn't worked, followed by the doctor's recommendation of surgery as a last ditch effort. On the bright side, however, the two of them had become closer, which, despite the circumstances, couldn't help but make Blaine happy. The two had a very vague line drawn between friendship and a relationship, but Blaine knew that Kurt was waiting until after the surgery to do anything about it. As he had said, he "didn't want to put Blaine through any more hurt if there was nothing that could be done but wait for the end." Blaine had shut him up rather quickly when he said that, protesting that there would definitely not be an end here.

"Is there a Kurt Hummel here?" he asked breathlessly as he reached the information table.

The nurse looked at him with concern, probably noticing the way he was panting, before checking the computer system. "Are you family?"

Blaine blanched at that. He had forgotten that he wouldn't be allowed to see him. As he stammered for a moment, he heard footsteps behind him and a man clear his throat.

"Which room is Kurt Hummel in?" the man asked, causing Blaine to jump and look back at him.

"And you are?" the nurse asked, looking between the two of them.

"I'm his brother, well step-brother, Finn Hudson," the man replied.

"You're Finn?!" Blaine exclaimed at the same moment that the nurse responded with, "Second room on the left."

"Who are you?" Finn asked, starting to move quickly down the hall as Blaine struggled to keep up with him.

"I'm Blaine."

"_You're _Blaine?!" Finn replied with a laugh, "Kurt talks about you all the time."

Blaine was about to respond when they turned into the room and he caught sight of Kurt lying in a hospital bed. His Kurt, looking sick and sad and everything he just wasn't.

"Kurt," he uttered almost inaudibly.

Kurt sat up as quickly as he could, "You came."

"Of course I did. I always keep my promises."

The two stared at each other for a moment before being interrupted by a cough behind them.

"Hey, bro," Finn said awkwardly with a wave, "Where's Burt and Mom?"

"Yes, hello!" Kurt squeaked, "They went to talk to the doctors. It should be any minute now."

"You'll be okay," Finn said more to himself than to Kurt as he and Blaine sat down by the bed. Blaine took Kurt's hand, rubbing his thumb reassuringly across Kurt's knuckles.

A few minutes later, a doctor walked in, followed by Kurt's parents.

"It's time, Kurt," the doctor said calmly as an anesthesiologist entered the room, starting to inject the drugs after a few words explaining what he was doing.

"Right now?" Kurt asked with a panic in his voice.

"I'm sorry, but yes. We have to get going."

Kurt looked wildly at Blaine, terror in his eyes. "It'll be fine. I'll see you soon." Blaine said, bringing Kurt's hand up to his mouth and pressing a kiss to it.

Kurt just nodded in response, shakily mouthing _I love you _to his family as the doctors wheeled him out of the room.

As the squeak of the wheels became quieter down the hallway, Blaine sat there in shock. He hadn't thought of anything to say in the moment, but now he could think of a million things that he should have said.

After another couple of minutes of near silence, Finn finally spoke. "So, you're Blaine?"

* * *

Blaine somehow managed to lose track of time, introducing himself to Burt, Carole, and Finn and getting to know the family. They told him stories of Kurt, including a particularly great one about the Single Ladies dance.

They were all laughing somewhat sadly at Finn's story about Kurt rescuing the turkey dinner one Christmas when they heard a knock on the door.

"Mr. and Mrs. Hummel?" the doctor asked, a completely unreadable look on her face.

Burt and Carole stood up, Finn and Blaine following suit almost immediately.

"So, as you can imagine with a surgery of this magnitude, there were some unforeseen complications. We had to remove a section of the muscle around the tumor and there will be quite a bit of scar tissue. It's not going to be an easy road back, but he's going to be okay," the doctor said, looking expectantly between the four of them.

There was complete silence for a moment. "He's going to be okay?" Burt finally asked.

The doctor nodded quickly, glancing at her charts.

Blaine gaped before sighing, "You should start with that information, okay? That should be the first thing you say."

* * *

"Blaine, dude," Finn called as he walked into the waiting room where Blaine was seated, knees bouncing anxiously, "Kurt wants to see you."

"You sure? The doctors said family first."

"We all saw him, and besides, it's pretty annoying when he keeps asking for you."

* * *

Blaine entered the room cautiously, rapping at the door with his knuckles.

"Anybody home?" he jested, biting his lip when he saw Kurt propped up in the hospital bed, connected to IVs.

"Blaine! I see you," came the response, a tired giggle escaping Kurt's mouth.

"It is indeed me. How are you feeling?" he asked, sinking into the chair beside the bed, lacing his fingers through Kurt's.

"Fantastic. I love morphine!" laughed Kurt, turning his head to look at Blaine with a smile, "You know what?"

"No, I do not know," Blaine responded, humoring him.

"I'm going to make you pancakes one day. And you're going to like it!"

"I bet I will."


	10. Epilogue

A/N: So... this is the end *sniff sniff* Thank you so much for reading and reviewing and I hope you enjoyed it!

* * *

*One Month Later*

"Blaine! You're here!" Kurt said enthusiastically as he opened the door to find Blaine on the porch, hopping up and down with a pizza box in hand.

"Of course I am silly! Wouldn't miss our first cancer free date for the world," Blaine responded, placing the pizza on the table. It had taken this long for Kurt to feel up to visitors, as he had been adamant about Blaine not seeing him in what he called his 'less-than-best condition.' Blaine had protested only a little bit but ultimately went along with it. They talked on the phone often, but Kurt had insisted that Blaine had to wait to see him.

"Oh, you brought pizza!" came Finn's voice as he walked into the living room, "That's good, since I didn't feed him yet. Oh and there's vicodin in the bathroom if you need it. I know some people take it for fun, but he actually needs it for his aches."

Blaine bit back a laugh, "Oh, okay. Are there any channels he can't watch?"

Kurt snorted, then saw Finn's look of confusion, "He's kidding, Finn. We'll be fine, now go. I'll see you tomorrow."

Finn waved awkwardly, walking down the front path to his car.

As Kurt shut the front door, Blaine moved closer to him, grabbing one hand and pulling him in for a kiss, earning a squeak from Kurt before he relaxed into Blaine.

"Ugh, I love you," Blaine breathed against Kurt's lips, pulling back when Kurt froze. Shit, shit, shit, he should not have said that. Not like this. His mind was racing, trying to find a way to fix it, when Kurt suddenly launched himself at him, arms snaking around his neck as his mouth moved against his hungrily.

"I love you too," he mumbled, pulling Blaine onto the couch as quickly as he could, pizza long forgotten.

* * *

As the evening turned into night, the two sat cuddled together, Blaine careful not to hurt Kurt as they sat as close to each other as humanly possible.

Blaine played with the short hair that was just beginning to grow on Kurt's head as Kurt smiled up at him fondly.

"So," Blaine whispered.

"So," Kurt muttered back with a grin.

"Now what?"

Kurt merely pulled him in for another kiss, fingers threading through Blaine's curls. "Now everything."


End file.
